Many a late night, I lay awake pondering the chaotic will of the universe. Much like the Watcher, I am doomed to merely report on and observe the entertaining wiles of alternative music. However, I’ve recently uncovered the ability to create bands from my own wildest imagination.
For my first trick, I decided to resurrect Big Black as a contemporary British act, featuring biting satire not seen since Jello Biafra’s prime. If you like Shellac but wish they were as directly outspoken as Steve Albini out of the studio, then I give you Selfish Cunt.
“Even the name is perfect!” you say.
“I know,” I reply, and hand you this: